Flexibility refers to a person's ability to choose from various options to achieve a desired outcome. It involves considering different perspectives to make informed decisions about the best course of action. When facing inflexibility, your child may get ‘stuck,’ may refuse to transition, or may keep trying the same response over and over even though it’s not working.
Adaptability is a person’s ability to cope with changes that are imposed upon them. For instance, a new teacher in a classroom, or an outing or holiday.
Routines can be important to help children feel safe, this is especially true when they are less adaptable to changing situations. Using timers, countdown and visuals can support them. It is also important to reward when your child is flexible, using some element of choice can promote this.
Transitions, whether big or small can be more distressing for some children. They may need additional support to find safety in these changes. This can be helping them with any questions they may have, doing extra research on a new activity or area or allowing them extra time to accept the change. This PDF has some more top tips.
Moving to secondary school is a busy time and there’ll be plenty of things on your child’s mind. It’s important to encourage your child not to bottle up any worries they have. The change may be particularly daunting for children, Kent Family has more details. BBC Bitesize has some great resources for parents of a child starting secondary school soon.
As we get older the need to be more flexible and adaptable grows. Education requires teenagers to consider different views and ways of solving problems and this may lead to additional challenges. Being able to be adaptable to the changing needs of peers and education is important. For younger learners some strategies are included in this Brightwheel blog.
For some young people the behaviour they display in response to the stress caused by change is distressing for them and those around them. The Maudsley Trust has some tips to help.
Useful resources
Read stories and watch programmes that offer different viewpoints, cultures and lives to broaden the child’s awareness and understanding.
- ‘The Invisible String’ (Patrice Karst and Joanne Lew-Vriethoff, 2018)
- ‘The Koala Who Could’ (Rachel Bright and Jim Field, 2017)
- ‘You Can Do Amazing Things – A Child’s Guide to Dealing with Change and New Challenges’ (Poppy O’Neill, 2022)
Videos